Dear friends: My apologies for not posting all that much recently. I've been off dancing on the thin line between sensibility and hot-mess-ocity. It's possible I'm improving, but I'm unsure if this is actually happening. Anyway, to tide you over, here's a small selection of amusing spam.
From: Dimple
I loath the possibility of marring this evening like an old granny with her handicraft on her knees.
I am young and hot and I want your lustful attention.
Do you wish me to be obedient and nice
or do you want me to take control and make you moan with delight? Welcome to my profile to start with and call me.
Let us make this weekend absolutely breathtaking!
From: Alva Pace
Watch for yourself and you'll wonder how many
awesome babies[?] seek for sex while their guy is out.
This site is only for people like us
who are done with looking at the miserable faces and just want stick. [umm, I don't think I want that, actually]
From: Jettie Lawler
Re: Take your pick, we're three foxy horny single babes here!
You could think, what three girls are doing going online and looking for hookups together.
But the thing is, it's not like we do this stuff on a daily basis.
We are just having fun together, literally right now,[and you can send email at the same time? That's actually impressive!] and we thought, we're all single, pretty, and looking to hook up.
So why the heck not, right? Men go online together too! [no, I don't think they do]
So, you know, check these thrilling pics we made, and let's do it!
From: Beatrice Darting
Re: Hook up without buying a shitload of Margaritas? Yes, and this night!
[honestly, I just posted this one because the headline is so priceless!]
Jeez it sounds like these girls really want your body. How do you keep denying them?
ReplyDeleteI can't decide which name I like better...Dimple or Beatrice Darting. I think Dimple wins because she made a granny reference in an spam e-mail intended to seduce. Instant mood-killer.
ReplyDelete