Change Of Plans...

Remember that brilliant plan I had?  Yeah, it didn't work out so well.

Since it's all pretty much resolved now, I think I can safely divulge the secret info:  the girl in question was Number Three.  It turned out that she's been involved in an alternative lifestyle for some time now.  She calls it 'polyamorous', to give you an idea of what it's all about.  In brief, it would have been complicated, and at least a few others (male and female) would have been involved.  So, not really expecting this, I did the right thing and decided not to get involved.

I gave her my phone number, and we talked a while, looking back on things, and catching up on what happened after.  She had much more to tell than I did.  Also, I'd like to point out here that my account of things may not be quite as accurate as I thought.  One or two of the dates might be wrong, and it might have been me who stopped talking to her. 

Talking to Number Three was actually sort of a comfort, despite how things ended before.  It was nice to hear her voice, and to talk about those old thoughts and little things we remembered about each other.  For a few moments, it was almost as if we'd never been apart.

But sadly, that's not something I can be a part of anymore, so I can't hang on to those old feelings.  Strange as it is to admit, I think there is still something left that I feel for her.  For some reason, this complicated heart of mine still cares about each and every one who once cared about me.  I'm not sure why I think/feel this way, but I guess that's just how I operate.

So for now, my journey continues.  Hopefully, I'll find myself in a good place soon.